I'm Pregnant and Nursing

For some reason, nursing while pregnant is pretty taboo and even frowned upon in American culture...  for me it was a necessity since I got pregnant when Emmaline was just 9 months old and couldn't afford a few months of formula but it was also my preference.  Let's break some barriers and talk about it, shall we?

First of all, nursing while pregnant is not dangerous to mommy or either baby as long as everyone is healthy to begin with and the pregnancy is normal.  According to research, the unborn baby gets first dibs on nutrients, then the outside baby, then the mommy.  This means that mommy can easily become dehydrated, develop a vitamin deficiency, or simply be a walking zombie because she's drained of all resources...  that would be me, by the way...  So, in order to stay healthy, a pregnant, nursing mother needs to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep per night and about 2500 calories per day in quality foods (and take a prenatal vitamin and some extra Vitamin D too, of course).  Easy peasy, right?  Not so much...

My nursing baby is still working on sleeping through the night.  Lately, Ryan has come to the rescue and he gets up with her if she needs support to get back to sleep.  This means I no longer nurse her all night long which has been so helpful, you have no idea.  I probably only get 6-7 hours of sleep per night but it's the best I can manage right now.  If I'm not working, I'll nap during Emma's morning nap which gives me an extra 20-90 minutes (she's so inconsistent right now, I have no idea what's going on...). 

I try to eat well, I swear I try!  This pregnancy has been so different than the last, I don't want sugar which is great (perhaps I won't gain over 60 pounds this time??) but I'm crazy for burgers and french fries!  Cooking makes me nauseous (STILL!!!  Just another thing that's different this time!) and I'm too tired to wash and chop veggies (and, let's be real, who can afford the pre-cut, pre-washed variety?).  I know I'm getting enough calories because I have managed to gain about 8 pounds so far (I'm 18 weeks along, for the record, so that weight gain is textbook) and my skin/hair/nails look just fine so I assume I have no deficiencies to speak of. 

Another concern people have is a drop in milk supply that is often unavoidable.  When I was about 6 weeks along, Emma just so happened to be going through a growth spurt and my milk supply was struggling to keep up.  Easily remedied by a few days of oatmeal, extra water, and Ovaltine plus the pediatrician suggested we give her a little whole goat's milk to bridge the gap.  At 10.5 months, we could have started her on a little cow's milk but our doc is a "better safe than sorry" kind of guy (which we appreciate) so we went with the goat's milk.  Which Emma loved.  From a sippy cup.  Like a big girl!  It relieved a little pressure from me and gave me a chance to catch up to her needs.  She continued to loooooooove her sippy of goat's milk until she was almost 12 months when we slowly started transitioning to cow's milk.  Which she loves ice cold from the fridge just like her mommy!

My milk supply has continued to drop a bit but Emmaline is kind of weaning herself just a bit so it's no big deal.  She wants to nurse first thing in the morning and before bed every day but during the day is variable.  If I'm at work, she obviously doesn't get to nurse.  If I'm home, I still nurse her on demand and I offer before naps.  If I offer, she'll always nurse for usually 2 minutes.  If she asks, again 2 minutes is it.  Before bed is usually just a tiny bit longer, it's the morning session that's the longer, more painful one....

Wait, nursing while pregnant is painful? 

You bet your sweet ass it's painful...

Like first 3 weeks of nursing a newborn painful...

Like, Emmaline just for fun or out of laziness is letting her teeth slowly close around my nipple painful...

Yeah, it hurts really bad.  I figure it's good practice to naturally managing the pain of contractions during my next labor and delivery.  I try to just breath through it.  There's a scientific explanation for the nipple pain that happens when nursing during pregnancy, something about ducts being opened up when they used to be closed or something?  Whatever it is, it hurts to the point that many women give up.  I totally see the appeal.  Here's why I'm not forcing Emma to wean and letting her lead the way...

1.  We didn't get her a flu shot this year.  She's not in daycare, she's still breastfed, she's really healthy.  I'd like to keep all those advantages until the end of the season.

2.  Emma is really healthy (see #1).  She's never even had a cold!  Have you ever heard of a 1 year old who has never had a cold or virus???  Yeah, that's my girl!  And I like to think that breastfeeding exclusively has played a huge part in that.

3.  I don't hate breastfeeding.  Okay, it's not my favorite thing but there are aspects of it that I like.  I take great pride in providing from my body for my daughter.  I love the snuggle time and the way she reaches up to grab my hand and places it on her ear or hair so I'll give her some tickles.

4.  I'm lazy.  I don't want to always have to remember to have organic whole cow's milk with me along with a clean sippy

So, I'm pregnant and nursing.  I've received criticism from family, questionable looks in public, and even encouragement to wean from my doctor but I've stayed strong and so has Emma.  We're in this together and I love this new level of communication we're establishing as we figure out how to make it work for the both of us.  And...  if it comes to it...  I'll welcome tandem nursing as best I can.  As much as I'd love to give my breasts a break for a couple months between nurslings, I welcome the challenge of nursing two at the same time and I know that, if Emma wants to, the benefits to her FAR outweigh any pain, inconvenience, or scrutiny I may go through.

Going From Stay at Home to Working Mom

That's right, I got a job!  It's nothing super exciting and it's not in my career field but it's a job!  I'm working part time at the mall at the Ann Taylor store.  There are many reasons why this is an incredible blessing and a couple reasons why I'm kinda "meh" about it.  Now, because I'm always real with you people (hey, you've read about everything from my postpartum vagina to my puppy getting a new home), I'm going to tell you all about it!

First of all, I love leaving Ryan home alone with Emmaline on a regular basis.  I think the best thing about me working has been that Ryan and Emma's relationship has grown exponentially stronger.  He's a more confident father, they have better communication skills, and she seems so much more in love with him now!  I'm so fortunate that my work schedule works pretty well around Ryan's work schedule so we don't need much daycare.  My parents have been amazing in providing what little daycare we have needed (usually 2-3 hours tops, 2-3 days/week tops).  We aren't paying someone to watch Emma and that's so awesome for our financial situation.  I won't bore you with the details but I'd basically have to get my dream job (with a dream salary) for us to be able to afford actual daycare for her right now... boo on this economy and how expensive daycare can be, am I right?!?

Aside from that, I love having time away from my daughter.  Don't get me wrong, you know I love Emma and have enjoyed the past year of staying home full time, but every grown up needs grown up time!  I get a few hours a couple times a week to be "Amanda" and let go of "Mommy" for a bit.  It's liberating while it's happening (hello, I'm not crawling around on the floor while trying to read a book to the baby while wiping yogurt out of her hair while trying to get my shoes on to take the dog for a walk...) and it's my favorite thing to come home and have my daughter be crazy happy to see me! 

I also love Ann Taylor : )  I'm not gonna lie (never do!) I can't afford Ann Taylor and basically never have been able to, but I've swooned over their clothes and purchased a few items at their outlet and factory stores before.  The clothes are so beautiful, don't get me started on the shoes, and the ladies who shop there are a hoot!  My managers are also two of the most caring, genuine, and responsive bosses I've ever had.  They have both accommodated scheduling emergencies and been so sweet and generous in giving me the position and regular hours when so many people don't that chance! 

The last thing I love is that I have to get dressed and put on make up for work.  For the last year, as a stay at home mom, I've used mascara and powder a few days a week and worn yoga pants and a ponytail most days.  That would SO not be cool at Ann Taylor.  I have to look nice for work.  I have to look like I shop there (which I have, once, since I started working there).  I feel so confident leaving my house in clothes that look nice with my hair styled and a full face of makeup and I think that confidence has made me happier in general.

Okay, I'm sure you want to know what I don't like...

I don't like leaving my house!  It's so hard to say goodbye to Ryan and Emma in the mornings!  And...  I miss my morning nap on the days that I work!  So I get my 5ish hours of night sleep (because my daughter is still not sleeping through the night very well and is going through a phase where she wants to go over her whole day with me in complete detail for an hour or two every night around 2am) and then I have to go to work...  on my feet...  carrying clothes around and waiting on women in the wardrobe rooms...  ugh...

The other thing is that the refrigerator there smells really bad so I'm discouraged from bringing my own perishable food so I sometimes buy food at the food court!  Aaaaahhhh!!!!  Nooooooo!!!!  Working my four hour shift absolutely does not justify a latte purchased before work and a sandwich purchased after but there have been a few days where it has happened...  boo... 

So, now you know.  I'm still looking for my dream counseling job but there's no funding in mental health or education in the State of Colorado right now so I'm pretty confident I'll be right where I'm at for a little while... which I'm okay with...  and I'm sure my dream job (with the dream salary) will be there when we're all ready for it.

Cloth Diaper Mommies: Want to Review Some Diapers on Your Blog???

Midnight Mommy is looking for bloggers who cloth diaper to review products on Kebbie's Diaper Bag! 

Here's the link: http://www.midnightmommy.com/2011/12/calling-bloggers-to-review-cloth-diaper.html